Controversy Loves The Spotlight…

I was recently introduced to a show on TLC that my daughter (the tween) thought would be fun to watch together. She has found shows such as “Little People, Big World” and “My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding” (have you seen this show?? ?? OMG it’s so ridiculous but I’m addicted! I LOVE IT!) to be very entertaining. I also really love seeing a show called “My 600 lb. Life”. This one I can kind of relate to. I love to see Dr. Nowzaradan and how he takes no BS ?! Most of all I love to see the transformations both physical and psychological.

I know I’m not 600 lbs but a lot of their eating issues are familiar to me. The show inspires me although I, myself would likely not have a surgical intervention. (Maybe cosmetic surgery later once I reach my goals? A girl can always benefit from a little nip and tuck! ?) <— This is my personal opinion and I definitely do not judge those who have chosen or are debating that route. For some, this route may be the only way to save their life! If it works for you, then I support you! Oh HELL! I didn’t really want to open up that box right now but since I have… Allow me to explain. I believe that surgical interventions help the immediate and obvious problem, but obesity and eating disorders (in my very humble opinion) are 99% psychologically driven. If the root of the problem is merely repressed or hypothetically “cut out” then surgical intervention is only a patch on a sinking ship. If the psychological part of is not intensely acknowledged, addressed, & defeated then the size of your stomach is truly irrelevant. <— this controversial topic we will discuss again a little further down the road. (? Take note: this is my opinion.)

OK – so Anyway, one of the days we were watching one of these many shows, I saw a clip or promo or advertisement (whatever) about a show called “My Big Fat Fabulous Life“. I was very quickly intrigued or repulsed? (I’m still debating this… ?) But I wanted to see more so I guess mission accomplished! ??

The next commercial break I set the DVR to record the series. (Yup I was suckered in! Hook. Line. Sinker. ?) I had to know what this girl and her story was all about. What was her “big” & “fat” fabulous life all about? Lucky for me there was a marathon or something and I was able to rapidly catch up on “Whit’s Life”. (Yes, we’re on a nickname basis. Don’t be jealous! ?) The short version of the story is she is a girl who was thin, then was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome), gained over 200lbs through college, and loves to dance, and now weighs 380 or so lbs. Anyway, I could really tell you so much more, but I’d prefer you just check out the show yourself if you’re interested… (FYI: I’m not being paid or coerced to say these things… LOL!!! ?)

The reason I’ve chosen to write about this TV show today is because I watched an episode last night that prompted some mixed feelings about a topic she, “Whitney”, and a comedian who’s name I don’t exactly remember discussed (or argued about).  (FYI: I do know she was NOT a fan of “fat” people and that she was a recovering alcoholic <—by her own words.) Anyway, she (Whitney) is an “intern” at a radio station and during the morning show they were interviewing said comedian. She quickly (I’m sure there is more to the story, especially since controversy loves the spotlight) began to speak a bit harshly about “fat people” in general. For dramatic purposes I am sure, the cameras zeroed into the “interns” face as the “comedian” continued to “fat bash”. Whit couldn’t hold back! She stormed in the studio and basically let it go! (Like in Frozen! ?☝?️⚡️?)

A small part of me was like “get it girl! you tell her like it is! yup!” but as the show went on, something clicked in me. Maybe I totally misunderstood the show (which is possible) but the “comedian” was talking about how “fat people” are “coddled” and how all fat people suffered from a food addiction whether they admitted it or not. (“Big Whit” did not like this AT ALL! <—— I personally agreed but hey, its her show not mine! I even subconsciously made that face towards my TV, you know that one that’s kind of like an uncomfortable “girl… you know she sorta right!”. ? HAHAHAHA!) Anyway, this was basically the topic of the entire show and is now my topic for this week. (Not that I don’t have an arsenal of topics! ?)

I most certainly believe that fat people have food addictions. (I’m an admitted food addict.) I don’t care how you try to spin it… if you find any comfort in food, if you feel like food makes you “feel better”, if you turn to food when you are hurt, mad, sad, angry, happy… YOU HAVE A FOOD ADDICTION. (I’m not yelling, its just emphasis…) The sooner you realize this and accept it, the sooner I truly believe you begin to change. (If a change is in fact what you’re looking for, if it’s not then press on…) On the flip side I 100% support “Big Whit’s” movement No BS! (Somehow these 2 subjects became intertwined with each other and I think it’s where the argument spiraled. Maybe it was just the way the producers put the pieces together to cause conversation…) so ✅. 

*** Can I take a moment and describe the conditions in which I am trying to write right now… My tween is tapping a cup and her hands in a patterned form about 5 feet away on the kitchen counter, that at this point sounds like nails scratching a chalk board! My husband is watching some news channel (a bit too loudly) that is talking politics and a whole bunch of other crap (I slowly feel the life being sucked out of me!). My threenager is exceptionally quiet so I should probably go see what the hell she is doing… ——————————————————————————————————————– LIPSTICK ON MY WALL!!!!!!!!!!!! Lipstick! LIPSTICK! ? She is shocked at my spinning head right now… OK- I think my head might just pop off! I’m not sure who I pissed off but recently she put an entire unrolled roll of toilet paper IN the toilet and FLUSHED IT! YES, FLUSHED IT! THEN proudly told me she washed her hands in the “wawler” as she and I both watched the toilet overflow. She proudly, I mortified… Does anyone know Supernanny Jo Frost? If so, please tell her I need her!!!!!!! I believe I may be failing as a parent. My tween might be annoying but NEVER did these things! 2 kids, same parents, same address… Did I miss something??***

Ok, I’m back… I needed a moment to refresh and breathe in the good Lords grace. Where was I? Ah yes! The “NO BS” movement. This movement is about “No Body Shame“. This isn’t only about “fat” bodies, its all people & their bodies & journeys. It’s about respecting fat ones, skinny ones, scarred ones, deformed ones or simply different ones. This movement supports the human. (My take) Something was said on the show that I think is important to reiterate… (not in these exact words) ‘We haven’t walked a day in another’s shoes’. If you see me eating at a restaurant for example, what would you immediately think? What judgements would you pass? What if I saw you walking down the street? What judgments would I, have I passed? Maybe the best way to approach this topic is TOLERANCE with TRUTH. 

The “comedian” was uncomfortably right in saying true “friends” shouldn’t be coddling a “fat” friend. It would be like telling your former alcoholic friend that it’s a genius idea to sit at a bar and hold a beer in their hand. It doesn’t help. The truth does hurt sometimes… 

The “intern” was also right… Be tolerant and respect each person’s journey. You don’t know where they’ve been or how far they’ve come. It should be a conversation. In my case, and for the sake of my personal growth & journey… I have to hold myself accountable for every single little morsel I put in my mouth and as uncomfortable as this may make me feel, I want my “friends” to call me out and not “coddle” me. You wouldn’t be helping me by feeding me another cupcake because you don’t want to hurt my feelings… (I may get cranky, likely because I’m hungry, but don’t let my fangs deter you… ???)

As I end this post (mostly because the dryer just stopped and I’ve got to get my threenagers princess sheets out or else sleep will not happen! #parentwin ????) I want you all to not only be more tolerant of each other as I will do the same, but also take ownership for yourself. (Believe me this has taken me some time to accept! And it’s a struggle everyday but only I can be responsible for my everyday actions.)

“If we could look into each other’s heart and understand the unique challenges each one of us face, I think we would treat each other much more gently, with more love, patience, tolerance, and care.” -Marvin J. Ashton
Until Next Time…

Your one and only,

– BadCupcakeGirl

12 thoughts on “Controversy Loves The Spotlight…

  1. Wonderful blog this week Claudia. It’s a fine line we walk where we have tolerance for our own weaknesses and hopefully others but don’t coddle ourselves with food when we “feel bad” or have had an extremely “hard day”. I believe your allowing us a place to discuss these issues will be good for all of us and I applaud your bravery.

  2. An example. I worked in an ER. There was a female resident, beautiful girl, blonde hair blue eyes….never a smile. Everyone made fun of her because she never smile AND wore her scrubs ‘way’ to tight. Months went on,as did the ‘way’to tight scrubs. One day I opened up a conversation with her. She had a really bad day and was crying. Long talk began. What no one knew or cared to know was on the past year she had lost 125 lbs. OH YES SHE DID. And how proud she was. Was a good talk No one looked into her heart, they just judged

    1. That’s incredible Robin! As humans we tend to quickly judge one another. Many times women are their own worst enemy! Sometimes it’s caused by intimidation & other times its jealousy. It’s very sad, but if each one of us takes the time to look past our own insecurities imagine how brilliant we’d all be! I’m glad you took the time to read my post and I’m certainly glad you took the time to make a comment.

  3. I had EXACTLY the same thoughts about that episode. The comedian was harsh, but right about the addiction. Whitney is right about accepting others who are physically different. Overweight and obese “wear” their addiction every day, while others with addictions don’t necessarily do that. We must understand their (our) struggle, and that all have something, it just may not be as obvious. Compassion.

    1. Yay!! I’m glad you saw it too, I was worried people may think I made it up! Thanks for commenting Tori. I appreciate you taking the time to read the post and share your thoughts!

  4. I totally laughed out loud cause I totally made the face during that episode “girl you know she kinda right”? . But I also totally wanted Whit to be right! in the end though valid points were made by both parties! By the way I totally feel your tween pain Benjamin is having the same issues with toilet paper and he recently drew all over his door and put toys down the vent grate ??

    1. LOL!!! You knew the face too!!! #bloggerwin Hunny, I most certainly wanted to cheer her on and be like… ???? but I had to be honest with my self and do “the face” ?. FYI: threenagers are not from this planet! Thanks for taking the time to read the post and comment Hannah!!

  5. Love that show and you! From a fellow addict to another (Want a cupcake? I sure as hell do… Cause i read this at the grocery store while hungry and you said cupcake so thats all I can think about now… Thanks Claudia! ) You speak everything I think about this food addiction problem I struggle with too. I keep telling my Drs .. My stomach isn’t he problem … Its my brain. My only problem with the show (Maybe petty) is she always talks about how PCOS and I sometimes feel like she is “crutching” on it just a bit. Don’t get me wrong still love it and her BS 🙂

    Amanda Faye

    1. Awww thanks Amanda!! ? I’m glad you love cupcakes too!!!! (I really need a cupcake emoji!) Anyway, yes I agree that she does blame PCOS a bit too much. I too have PCOS and know many women who do too. Listen, it sure doesn’t help this process but I believe 100% food addiction is mental. Like any other addition. I’m not a brain expert but I do believe in “triggers” for some it’s drugs, for others it’s alcohol, for us it’s food!

  6. I love reading your posts Claudia! I literally LOL about your threenager and the lipstick. ?? Keep up the good work, I look forward to your next post!

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